The Power of Listening: Helping Through Active Engagement
Introduction
When someone tells us they are struggling, our first instinct may be to solve the problem. We may immediately start giving advice.
Sometimes, however, the person doesn’t need an immediate solution. They need someone who will listen.
Listening Is More Than Hearing
Hearing means receiving someone’s words. Listening means trying to understand the person behind those words. Good listening involves:
- Giving your full attention.
- Avoiding unnecessary interruptions.
- Allowing silence.
- Asking gentle questions.
- Avoiding judgment.
- Taking their feelings seriously.
What Not to Say
Certain responses may unintentionally shut down a conversation. Avoid statements such as:
- “Just stop thinking about it.”
- “Everyone has problems.”
- “You need to be strong.”
- “It could be worse.”
- “Forget about it.”
These statements may make someone feel misunderstood.
What Can You Say Instead?
Try:
“That sounds really difficult.”
“I’m glad you told me.”
“You don’t have to go through this alone.”
“Would you like to talk about what has been happening?”
These responses create space for communication.
You Don’t Have to Become Their Therapist
Being supportive does not mean becoming responsible for someone’s entire recovery. Encourage professional help when needed. A psychologist, psychiatrist, doctor, or other qualified healthcare professional can provide appropriate assessment and treatment.
Listening Can Create Connection
People often remember how they were treated during their most difficult moments. Sometimes, feeling heard can help someone feel less isolated. Listening may not solve everything.
But it can help someone take the next step.
